It's important to be aware of the traditional superstitions surrounding death, however, so keep in mind cultural differences when selecting your flower. Votive paper symbolizes paper money, and coins are dropped along the way to the cemetery. It even has its own nameo ng B. In popular Vietnamese culture, the animistic folk religions were melded with, rather than supplanted by religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Confucianis This is how long it takes the spirit to be re-born again into a new life. The death body is cleaned with alcohol or water, removed from the old clothes and worn in the death clothes. EN. This link will open in a new window. , but thats not always the case. Wearing a mourning headband is not only to show affection and respect, but it is also used to distinguish the relationship between the deceased and the wearers, who may not be very familiar. The average altar is a wooden cabinet that holds flowers and food. If the deceased's life was cut short due to misfortune, illness, or an accident, then the music is toned down to a proper somber tempo/style. Many users would be better served consulting an attorney than using a do-it-yourself online Each region, each ethnic group will have different customs and habits, so the music used in a Vietnam funeral will also vary, bringing different atmospheres of the funerals. Death & Dying Handout Nov 04 - Asian Health Services. Funeral guests frequently give gifts of money to the family before the funeral. The family altar is often carried to the gravesite where it is reassembled. This phenomenon of people dying close to each other is considered bad luck, bringing more deaths to the family, although how serious it also depends on the date and time of the last breath. Many people celebrate the death anniversary of their ancestors because they believe that their spirits continue to wander in this world, should be taken care of, and also invited to visit. If you have an extended stay with the family, you will see them giving food offerings at the home altar before each meal. Meanwhile, family members announce the passing of their loved one to relatives and friends. Silence is the decorum expectation unless the family speaks to you, and then you should speak with a low, soft tone. The Vietnamese funeral you attend in the U.S. may have some of the traditions above or all of them. The deceased will be buried or cremated based on the familys wishes and religious preferences. The flowers are gathered and taken to the cemetery or crematory. To avoid that, lets check out several dos and donts below: Hi there, I'm a passionate writer about all things culture, travel, culinary, and more! . Death is a logical next step for Vietnamese elders that lived a full, happy life. If you're attending a Buddhist funeral, you're likely to participate in different traditions, or to at least bear witness to them. The Western trumpet band is also mainly used in the South, usually playing at Cloth Wrapping and Body Placing stages, and when moving the coffin to its final resting place, but the family can request the music to be played whenever. It marks the end of a lifetime and premises a good beginning of the next life. Additionally, many Vietnamese mothers are expected to rest indoors (and even take no shower) for a month after giving birth. The one day viewing usually starting in the morning or noon lasts well into the evening, generally the day before the funeral, and typically includes the ambiance of candlelight and incense. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. However, it is considered rude and very disrespectful to smile or laugh while at the wake or funeral. It is considered bad luck for menstruating women to light incense. When someone dies, the family will invite a shaman to perform a ceremony and hang the corpse on a rack, and organize a feast at home until the body is taken to the cemetery, where they continue the ceremony. If youre a close family member youll wear a white robe or hat. Upon death, organ transplant and/or autopsies may be accepted with very careful explanation. Whether you're attending a Vietnamese funeral, organizing one, or just are curious about the customs, this article will provide an overview of Vietnamese beliefs and traditions regarding death, as well as what to expect when attending a Vietnamese funeral. Except from the depraved customs, funerals in Vietnam are a long-standing and unique culture that brings many human values to the local people. TOP 6 THINGS ABOUT VIETNAMESE FUNERALS TO KNOW, Vietnamese funerals: Vietnamese death rituals, Vietnamese funeral attire for those who come to the funeral, Vietnamese funeral music according to Northern customs, Music in Vietnamese funerals in accordance to Southern customs, Vietnamese funeral superstitions: Do-tom-ami. As with all Asian funerals, honoring tradition, customs and heritage is fundamental to Vietnamese ceremonies. If you're worried about selecting the right arrangement, white flowers are generally a welcome sympathy gift at a Vietnamese funeral, especially the white lotus. In modern times, and for practicalitys sake, home altars are now set up to ease the deceaseds journey into becoming an ancestor. Cake offers its users do-it-yourself online forms to complete their own wills and By clicking "Accept", you agree to our website's cookie use as described in our Cookie Policy. Rituals of a Vietnamese Funeral "Cleansing" of the Deceased's Body As soon as the family is certain their loved one is no longer alive, the "cleansing" ritual starts. The children of the deceased will use the most special clothes, often called tham troi, which are wide and knee-length shirts, sewn of coarse fabric but not carefully sewn, leaving with rather ugly natural fibers, loose sleeves. At Cake, we help you create one for free. 41 Heartfelt Quotes for Missing Loved Ones at Christmas. Another important aspect to remember during Dam Gio is what to say on a death anniversary. Instagram. This attitude toward death may be influenced by the fact that older adults are highly respected in Vietnamese culture, and therefore, aging and death may not conjure up as many negative connotations as within Western cultures. Let us share it with you in this article. When introduced to a new culture, respecting traditions is essential to show honor to your host. Sally is a prolific non-fiction and fiction writer, who has appeared in multiple print and digital publications. This is an important tradition in Vietnam that can be traced back many centuries. Odd numbers are considered lucky by the Vietnamese, and when lighting incense, guests should choose three or five sticks, with three being the ideal. Accept, Vietnamese Funeral Service Traditions & Protocol, Vietnamese Burials, Mourning, and Death Anniversaries, In this guide, well break down the history, traditions, and etiquette at Vietnamese funerals. A bowl of rice, a boiled egg, a small plate of salt, and a small cup of water are what they need to prepare. Vietnamese bishops recently released a set of guidelines focusing on ancestor worship for Catholic families to follow. While Vietnamese mothers are expected to rest indoors without taking a shower for a month after giving birth. Many Vietnamese people see death as a natural phase of the life cycle. Vietnamese funerals are one of the important events of the family, not only showing traditional customs and rituals but also for family members to express their regret and condolences. Staterooms at our Whittier mortuary and the newly built Hua Yuan Ceremonial Complex are designed with the specific cultural needs of Asian families in mind. The next morning comes signifying its time for the procession. During this time, families will gather together to offer prayers and offerings to the deceased. This belief dictates death planning for the Vietnamese. Facebook. After three years, a completion mass is heldsymbolic of the souls passage as an ancestor into the afterlife. Though having similar meanings. Loss is hard. After the body has been interred, the funeral procession returns to the home where a meal is served. The right words can bring comfort during the holidays. A Vietnamese funeral tradition that cannot be missed is the Filial Music played by Ceremony Band, which used to be called 8 Sound Band for using various musical instruments to represent 8 tones. Instead, this is a festive day during which family members and friends gather to honor their family members who have passed away. The mood remains somber. Other families have pictures of their family members on theirVietnamese altar instead of hanging a colorful background panel. Once the family table is set with all the food, the eldest member of the family prays in front of the altar to invite spirits into the home. The ceremony is held at the house of the eldest member of the family, who is in charge of arranging the necessary elements of the ceremony. In the Vietnamese culture, remembering the death of a loved one and conducting a death ceremony is a filial act. Most Vietnamese Buddhists Belong to the Mahayana school. Staff Writers. Funeral songs arent played at Buddhist ceremonies. Later, the family sends photographic mementos to family and friends that couldn't attend. Therefore, Vietnamese funeral clothes are also focused on, appropriately selected to show respect and remembrance for the deceased, and at the same time clearly distinguish roles and relationships between family members. Another depraved custom of Vietnamese funeral is do-tom-ami - burying babies alive with their deceased mothers, often in hidden villages in the Central Highlands and some central provinces. Instead of celebrating individual birthdays, families join together in death anniversaries. Musicians accompany the procession and play uplifting celebratory music if the deceased died a natural death after a long life. As soon as the family is certain their loved one is no longer alive, the cleansing ritual starts. Vietnamese believe a persons soul wanders after death. In fact, due to Confucianism, families are to set aside a three-year mourning period when parents pass away to show the proper amount of respect and honor. form. Particular passions, milestone moments and legacies created weave together to tell a story that is completely unique. Vietnamese bishops issue guidelines on ancestor veneration., www.ucanews.org/news/vietnamese-bishops-issue-guidelines-on-ancestor-worship/86469, Nguyen, Peter. Family members coordinate and decide who is in charge of each task during the two-day celebration and ritual of Dam Gio. Our state-of-the-art witness crematorium allows families who wish to participate in the cremation of their loved ones to do so. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure. The Vietnamese celebrate this event and invite the spirits of their family members to visit their home and fulfill their filial responsibilities. We'll help you get your affairs in order and make sure nothing is left out. The family will choose a lucky day for their loved ones funeral, so prepare to have a flexible schedule when planning to attend. Twitter. Some sects burn the paper to speed its process in reaching the deceased in the afterlife. Most people in Vietnam have a ghost story: from a butterfly landing on them during a funeral to strange voices at night. After a death, there is typically a visitation. Ghosts in Vietnam are known to take on many forms and do not fit into one category. In general, discussion, avoid joking, negatively criticizing or discussing sensitive issues that involve the family, and being indifferent to the family's grief. In fact, incense burning is a prominent part of Vietnamese funerals. Below are some commonly asked questions around Vietnamese funeral traditions, customs, and beliefs. According to Vietnamese funeral customs, if it is permanent, the grave will be built firmly, but if it is reburial, the grave is only lightly covered with earth and grass. advice. Confucianism was introduced in Vietnam during the Chinese conquest. Many elderly people revealed that not only are babies buried alive with their mothers, who unfortunately died during childbirth, but babies who are still breastfed also cannot escape the death. White mourning wreaths often use chrysanthemums, roses, lilies, to express the purity, modesty, and sophistication of the deceased in the eyes of the sender, as well as their mourning. As a nurse, Hoang "searched all over town for some morphine to relieve his pain [while] Grandchildren showed him how well they did in school.". The purpose of this stage is to clean the death body and place it inside the coffin. Superstitions differed based on location, too. For example, Vietnamese Buddhists pray for the deceased for 49 days. Keep in mind that many modern families have adopted Western cultural funeral rites, while others have created a hybrid tradition in a blending of the two. Dam Gio altar decorations include fresh, bright-colored flowers in beautifully decorated vases and two candleholders in each corner of the altar. Join our feeds to automatically receive the latest headlines, news, and information formatted for your club's website or news reader. Most families would prefer that attendees dress in a respectful manner. The traditional "banh . Then, nails are clipped, and the body is dressed in new clothes. During visitation, the family sits at the front of the room, greeting those who have come to show support. Heres some more useful information before you attend. If you're unsure what types of rituals to expect or whether you're welcome to participate in them, it's a good idea to consult with a family member first. If you're attending a Catholic Vietnamese funeral, some traditions may include: Funeral Masses usually follow the standard Catholic service; however, there may be readings or reflections based on the life and beliefs of the deceased. It may be surprising to you how openly the family talks about death. This is how long it takes the spirit to be re-born again into a new life. A car adorned with funeral flags and flower arrangements leads the entourage. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. It is located at the eastern edge of mainland Southeast Asia , with an area of 311,699 square kilometres (120,348 sq mi) and population of 96 million, making it the world's sixteenth-most populous country . The ritual begins with food and meal preparations. Vietnamese people believe it is a bad misfortune to die away from home. Most Vietnamese are Buddhist; other religious preferences include Catholic, Evangelical Protestant, and Chinese Confucianism. After Cloth Wrapping, relatives stand around and use canvas at the four corners to lift the dead person, placing them in the coffin - Body Placing stage. Death and Dying in Vietnamese Culture In Vietnamese culture, religion dictates some of the rituals in the dying and bereavement process. Do you still have questions about attending a Vietnamese funeral? NOTE: Understanding the role culture plays in health care is essential. While awaiting the delivery of the casket, the deceased is placed on their bed. Prayers, readings, and singing may be part of the service, depending on the religious affiliations and beliefs of the family. Rose Hills introduced the complexwhich welcomes families of all cultural backgroundsin 2019. If you are attending a Dam Gio, be sure to familiarize yourself with the rituals and their significance so youre prepared to show respect towards the Vietnamese culture and the men and women being celebrated. The baby's hair and nails must never be cut during the first . LinkedIn. forms. The deceased is washed once more and dressed in white clothing, then placed in the casket. Not quite half of Vietnamese Americans are Buddhist. Some believe that those who fail to show proper respect to their parents and ancestors could receive bad luck and misfortune during their lives. of an actual attorney. Family members will set up an altar right at their home and continue with the next steps of the funeral. Create a free website to honor your loved one. Catholics believe in both cremation and burial, though the Catholic church previously did not encourage their community to be cremated (this has since been changed). Vietnamese people believe that it is a bad misfortune to die away from home, but also bad luck if they carry a corpse home. Guests are expected to bow toward the loved one as a sign of appreciation for lessons regarding impermanence of life. During these 49 days, the soul is on its journey into the afterlife. Death Rituals & Traditions Around the Globe. Springfield, IL, England. We believe reflecting on our mortality can help us lead more meaningful lives. Ancestor worship isnt as much a superstition as it is a religious practice in Vietnam. Be mindful of the dress code. From the colors of dress to the length of visitation, the characteristics of a Vietnamese funeral ceremony are significant yet varied. For example, I was shocked to discover that Americans and perhaps, most citizens of the Western world do not photograph funerals or wakes. advice. Our expert guidance can make your life a little easier during this time. We are not attorneys and are not providing you with legal CopingWith the First Thanksgiving Without Your Loved One, It can be difficult to adapt to life after the loss of a loved one, and it might seem like things will never go back to being the same. The fees for the advice of an attorney should not be compared to the fees of do-it-yourself online This link will open in a new window. Particularly, if the death is recent or hasnt exceeded two years, its important to be sensitive about what is communicated to the grieving family. Keep reading to find out what to expect at a funeral in this beautiful Southeast Asian country. For information about opting out, click here. Most Vietnamese Buddhists Belong to the Mahayana school. Ethnic people believe that when the children are not breastfed, they will eventually die, so do-tom-ami will help bring the child back to the mother, receiving better care. (Note: In Vietnamese culture, odd numbers are typically considered to be lucky. In South America, people celebrate the Day of the Dead in November, and in Vietnam, this celebration is Dam Gio. Mourners often wear white headbands. Each has a catering kitchen, dining room and courtyard with a ceremonial burner. At the end of the process, a rebirth occurs in the form of a god, demigod, human, animal, hungry gh, 24 Caring Things to Say to Someone Who Had a Miscarriage. Also, it prevents the dead from coming back to haunt the living. Therefore, since 2015, the local government has carried out many educational activities to help the Mong people here change in accordance with new cultural lifestyles and fine customs of the nation. In the Vietnamese culture, remembering the death of a loved one and conducting a death ceremony is a filial act. In Vietnam as elsewhere, these ceremonies are predictable events in the steady unfolding of a life, as inevitable as the change of seasons. Vietnamese funerals offer you a brief look at the colorful culture of its people. [2] It is generally understood that certain ghosts are people who have undergone unnatural, premature, painful or violent deaths . However, today, it usually lasts around three days. Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information, Cremating the deceased cremation is the preferred method of disposition at a Buddhist funeral as the physical body is believed to hold little significance, The burning of incense at the altar of the deceased, Singing or chanting different sutras (prayers), Bringing offerings to the person who has passed away (such as incense, fruits, food, or candles), Displaying photographs and memorabilia of the deceased for mourners to pay their respects (usually placed around an altar). Around the world, everyone celebrates birthdays, but in Vietnam, they celebrate other important dates a little differently. The family places the body in the coffin on the first day, relatives and friends visit on the second, and on the third, they bury or cremate the body (cremation is a traditional Buddhist approach, but customs differ among families). Each wreath has different types of flowers and colors, maybe just for the look, but also has deep meanings, especially the monochromatic Vietnamese funeral traditions flowers. Bring a gift such as white flowers. By clicking "Accept", you agree to our website's cookie use as described in our Cookie Policy. Depending on the position of each person in the family, their mourning time for the deceased is different, representing a long-standing civilization with hierarchical order and strict rules. Depending on the religious affiliations of the family, it's common to wear white or dark colors as a sign of respect and mourning. According to Vietnamese funeral traditions, when the person is out of breath, a chopstick is placed across the jaw to prevent teeth from grinding together and some rice, and three coins (or gold) are put in so that the dead person does not turn into a hungry ghost. Be sure to find out the familys religious preferences before attending. This is so the spirit can gently move into higher states and be reborn in a better realm. The grieving process is a. The Vietnamese strongly believe that a person should die at home and be surrounded by his family. This is an important tradition in Vietnam that can be traced back many centuries. Here are the most common funeral rituals so you can knowwhat to expect at a Buddhist funeral: Death is another part of life for Vietnamese Buddhists. They can be "pleasant and feared, harmless and dangerous, moral creatures and unhappy suicides, male and female, human and un-human". He then pours wine and burns incense previously placed in the altar. The deceased is washed once more and dressed in white clothing, then placed in the casket. Please note that the information provided here is just a general overview of Vietnamese funeral traditions, beliefs, and superstitions; it is important to be aware of any specific customs, preferences or beliefs associated with the funeral service you are attending. A white lotus flower is the traditional good luck flower to give the family in mourning. Note:No matter what a family's culture and traditions are, planning or attending a funeral is hard. Hopefully, the above information has helped you better understand the Vietnamese funeral traditions. form. Ancestors that aren't properly worshiped turn into malevolent ghosts that haunt family members. The design of the tall funeral structures called chao pha and heo "trees . Each culture has a special way to commemorate the death anniversary of their loved ones. Mournful tunes start once again to mark the deceaseds final moments with family at home. The purpose of Dam Gio is to provide offerings to passed loved ones, so they are comfortable wherever they are. According to the Vietnamese concept, death is not an end but they just move to another world, reunite with their ancestors, and then there will come a time for the living to meet those who have passed away. In Vietnamese homes, people keep altars year-round to remember their deceased family members. Christmas Card Etiquette After a Death in the Family. The deceased will be buried or cremated based on the family's wishes and religious preferences. Vietnamese Author Dieu-Hien T. Hoang describes her uncle's death, recalling how each family member "used their talent to "serve" [her] uncle [on his deathbed].". In Vietnam, there are also many traditional superstitions about death. Bring comfort and peace to those grieving during the holidays. Family members that die a bad (violent) death are more likely to be a bitter spirit than those that die a good death. This link will open in a new window. Cake values integrity and transparency. Vietnamese funerals have complex rituals, to say the least: gold coins and rice in the deceased person's mouth, finger and toe nails clipped and packaged, and, weirdest of all, a vigilant guard for the coffin so that cats and dogs don't jump over the body and bring the deceased back to life. There may be flowers and food. Thai funeral customs vary according to the cause of death as well as the age, gender and social position of the deceased. Immediate Need: Call 24/7 at 562-699-0921 | Cemetery hours:Sunrise to Sunset Daily | General business hours: 8:00 AM-5:00 PM Daily. The funeral, held at home, usually includes a large tent set up in front of the building for guests to visit. 1, 6, Regents of the University of California, 2006. online.ucpress.edu/jvs/article-pdf/1/1-2/314/339470/vs_2006_1_1-2_314.pdf. In a Vietnamese Catholic home, you will find altars to God and the deceased next to each other. Traditionally, black and white funeral or mourning flags are placed outside the home to follow the road to the main thoroughfare. We are not attorneys and are not providing you with legal Vietnamese funerals have different etiquette customs you might not encounter in the U.S. For the burial, its appropriate to wear white or black depending on your relationship to the deceased. A funeral in Vietnam begins not only from the moment one dies, but also from the moment that person is weak and / or dying. This link will open in a new window. Vietnamese Burials, Mourning, and Death Anniversaries The burial is another time for the family to grieve and say their last goodbye. Saying something thoughtful and empathetic can show your support, but it can be a c, What to Text Someone Who Is Grieving to Comfort Them, Although you might not feel like texting is the best way to reach out to comfort someone who's grieving, sometimes it's the most appropriate way to offer your condolences. Ethnic groups, like the Hmong, slaughter cows to make sure the deceased travels into the afterlife. Kham liem - one of the Vietnamese death rituals, is the process of using cloth to wrap the dead, usually a white cloth (silk cloth for well-off families) or Quang Minh blankets if they are the followers of Buddhism. Celebrating a one-month-old baby is like commemorating a president's first 100 days in office. In this chapter we shall describe the way in which some Vietnamese people cope with death and dying. Although death is an inevitable part of life, understanding its customs and beliefs can help to honor the memory of the deceased and show respect for their family. The ceremony you see may be different depending on the region and country of the deceased but the community involvement is the same. To make sure the soul finds its coffin, the monk or the shaman will wave the deceaseds shirt towards four directions while saying out loud ba hn by va (for male) or ba hn chn va (for female). This can be fruit, wine, or a gift basket made for the occasion. The second day is considered the main day of Dam Gio. Then, nails are clipped, and the body is dressed in new clothes. Vietnamese funerals both shows love and mourning for the deceased, and helps the living move on with their lives. First, the body is cleaned using a towel with water infused with fragrant leaves and rice wine. (For example, red is considered a color for happier and joyful occasions, so sending red flowers wouldn't be a good idea.) The host of the event prays and invites the spirit of deceased family members into the house, leaving more than one tray of food if the spirit decides to bring friends along. Returns to the home to follow the road to the cemetery website 's cookie use as described in cookie... 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